BackTracking
by thebloggerwholived
Summary: Lily Evans and James Potter; a prefect and a marauder; a rule-monger and a rule-breaker; second in the year and first in the year. Lily did not want to fall for James, she did not want to become James' girlfriend, she did not want to love him with an inch of her life. But that's what happened, and that's what she did. In-progress.
1. OWLs

**So, I am doing this. Writing a fanfiction series. Whew!**

 **First time trying to do this, so please, please leave reviews and let me know how the first chapter came along. Enjoy! :)**

* * *

Chapter 1

O.W.L.s

"Lily", yelled James, running after the redhead. The entire evening had passed in a blur for James, and he _had_ to talk to her after everything that had transpired that day. She, however, it seemed, wanted nothing to do with him. She had religiously avoided him all day. It had come to a point where James had to steal Lily's Potions textbook and hide in the Potions classroom, begging to every god there was that she would come down to the dungeons looking for the book, and he could have a decent conversation with her. She, nevertheless, had taken one look at him, a look laced with contempt, and muttering an 'I should have known', had turned around to make her way back up.

James pushed his way through the first-years, and finally catching up with Lily, got hold of his wrist to pull her back from her furious march. Lily turned around, and James immediately launched into his apology. "Listen to me Evans, please, I'm sorr-" James began, but Lily's eyes flared at his words and- SMACK!

Lily slapped James with all the strength she could've mustered. James staggered as the entire corridor around them, earlier abuzz with the sound of chatter and laughter, and an overall relief at the end of the OWLs examinations, went deathly still.

"Bloody git, Potter", swore Lily, a hatred in her voice James had never heard before. "You think apologising is going to make all of this- everything you did to Severus today- alright?" Lily was shaking with anger, and students all around her slowly began to back away. "You humiliated Severus, you humiliated me, and you broke my oldest friendship ever, and you think saying sorry is going to fix everything, win me back over?" Lily questioned, her voice dangerously low.

"Evans, if you would just please listen to me-" "Why, _why_ should I, Potter? Give me one damned good reason." James ran a hand through his hair in frustration, a habit governed by his impulse. It was a long time before he spoke.

"I'm sorry. Okay, I am sorry for what I did. I shouldn't have done it. But what he said, everything that he did, Evans I didn't make him do it. He was being a git, and yeah, maybe I shouldn't have hexed him without any reason, but you can't possibly think I'm the worst man coming out from all of this. Merlin, Evans, why do you have to delude yourself when it comes to him so goddamn much-"

 _Impact!_ James backed a little, his cheek flaming under the pain of yet another slap, but he didn't so much as wince. He turned defiantly to face Lily.

Lily gave him the most hateful look she could possibly muster. _Why do you have to delude yourself so much?_ Bloody egotistical git. Her eyes were wide and ablaze, her chest heaving under the strain that it was taking for her to breathe. She leaned forward so that she was dangerously close to him. She wanted him to hear what she said very clearly, wanted him to know that she meant every single word of what she was saying. "Go to hell", she hissed to James, every word ringing with conviction, before turning around and marching off to the Gryffindor Tower.

James watched her go, his defiance and anger seeping out of his body with every breath that he took. Sighing deeply, he sank against an opposite wall. People around him were muttering things, talking amongst themselves in hushed whispers, but he was oblivious to it all. Completely, blissfully oblivious to everything.

"Fan-freaking-tastic!"

* * *

"Lils, don't do this to yourself", said Alice softly, cradling a sobbing Lily, trying to comfort her, while she nearly choked on her tears. "Snape was bound to show his true colours, sooner or later, he didn't deserve to have a person as gloriously wonderful as you as his friend."

"She's right Lily", said Mary, running her hand through Lily's hair. "I am sorry you had to hear everything he said to you, but you are so much better off without him."

Slowly hiccoughing herself back to normalcy, she sat up. "You don't understand, he- he was the first one to introduce me to all of this; to magic, to Hogwarts. He was"- Lily's voice trailed off.

"He was a son of a bitch then, just grew into a bigger one now", said Marlene, in a matter-of-fact tone. "I don't think that's helping, Marls", said Alice, frowning at her friends, but Lily gave a weak chuckle, which caused all the three girls to visibly relax a little.

"You're right, I am overreacting", said Lily, lying back down. "He chose his path a long time ago, all of this, it's not new to him, it's probably what he has been thinking of me for ages."

All the three girls had identical sad smiles on their faces, and Lily, despite herself, couldn't help but grin at the sight.

"Lily-" started Alice, but Lily cut her off, knowing pretty well what was coming. "Don't, Alice, please. He deserved it", said Lily, though she had to admit that it felt more like she was justifying her actions to herself rather than her friend.

"Maybe he deserved a slap on his face, Lils, but you knocked him across the room with everything you said. He was being mean, but he still did try to look out for you when Severus called you you-know-what", Alice calmly reasoned to her friend. Lily sighed. "Maybe, that's true Alice, but I really don't want to think about it now, I'm too tired for that. Can we please just call it a really, really terrible day, and sleep on it?" Lily asked, her voice cracking by the end. Marlene smiled and leaned forward to kiss Lily on her forehead, the way she had been doing since they were eleven. "Of course, sweetie", she whispered and got up from her bed. Mary squeezed Lily's hand, and Lily squeezed back, grateful that Mary did not insist on talking any more than they had already. All of them got up and silently made their way towards their own beds, muttering quiet good nights to each other, before Lily pulled her drapes shut, and collapsed on her bed.

* * *

The golden snitch, very much to James' annoyance, was doing nothing to clear his mind today. He would let it go, and catch it a moment later, and the rush of reflexes would do nothing to clear the pain etched in James' mind. His heart ached for Lily, and yet, he couldn't find it in himself to walk over to the staircase leading to the girls' dormitory and call out to her, as he normally did (very much to her annoyance). The other Marauders had retired to their own beds, knowing fully well that given the state he was in, there was no way of talking James into peace. He would find it for himself, eventually. _Not today,_ thought James bitterly. Peace seemed like the last thing he could hope of attaining at the moment, right after sleep that is. As the snitch zoomed out of his hand for the umpteenth time, a small creak made him instantly grab out the snitch. Someone was there, and James was sure that he did not want to explain why he was sitting in front of the fire in his common room, toying with a snitch. He looked around to see who it was and felt his heart heave outwards.

Standing at the bottom of the stairs to the girls' dormitory, dressed in cute little pyjama bottoms and a Gryffindor top, her eyes puffy and red, tear stains all over her face, and her red hair sticking out in a mess, was Lily.

An involuntary smile crept onto James' face, a smile that only Lily could illicit, and his mind went blank with giddiness. But with the force of a hypogriff, the memories of the day came rushing into him, and the smile vanished off his face. He looked away from Lily and at the fire one last time, before getting up and awkwardly clearing his throat. Avoiding the rush of emotions that he felt racing through him, he awkwardly cleared his throat. "Sorry, er- I'll, um- yeah, I'll go upstairs", he mumbled, risking one more glance at Lily, before turning around.

It was the last glance that made Lily's heart break. That expression on Potter's face was too much for her to handle. His eyes, usually lit with mischief, were filled with pain and hurt, and she knew that he wanted her to understand him and his actions today more than anything. And to think that all the usual traces of joviality were gone from his face because of her and that she had managed to hurt him even more than she had that afternoon, in ways more than one, was more hurtful than she could imagine.

"Potter wait- _James_ stop", called out Lily to stop James from leaving. For a moment there was total silence, a silence where they both seemed to digest her words. James. _James._ She had called him James. After five years of calling him Potter, or better still- that arrogant toerag, 'James' felt funny rolling off her tongue. James slowly turned around, an amused smile on his lips. Any other time, this smile would've caused Lily to scowl at his direction, but this time, she just felt happy that he wasn't hurting anymore.

"Did you just-" James began to ask, but Lily broke him off. "We're definitely not going to talk about that", she said, sighing and making her way to the couch before plopping down on it. She gestured to the seat beside her and asked, "Sit with me, will you?" James' eyebrows shot up, and his smile widened even more. She sighed yet again, albeit this time she couldn't hide the smile that crept across her face.

James crossed the length of the room and sat down beside Lily, trying his best to think of something sensitive, something caring and comforting. Apparently, all of that did not come naturally to him. _Damn! Where is Moony when you need him?!_ He cleared his throat awkwardly and began to say something along the lines 'I know today was hard for you, and I am sorry for my part in all of it', something that sounded genius in his head, when Lily cut him off. "Look, Potter, today was hard for me. And despite the fact that you did have a major part in it, I- I should not have yelled at you the way I did. I guess I just needed to vent out all the frustrations I had because of Se- Snape."

James' eyebrows shot up to his hairline., and stayed there for a while. After a few seconds of not getting a response, Lily frowned and glanced at James. The expression on his face made her laugh loudly. After the day she had had, the laughter warmed her up like a mug of butterbeer. James' quizzical expression dropped, and he gave a little chuckle of amusement before sobering up. "Lily, you don't have to apologize. I know what I did was immature and mean, and just plain wrong, but I had no intention of hurting you or ruining your friendship", James said apologetically. "Though I still think you're so much better off without that git", he added, which caused Lily to give him a stony look. "He's not half as bad as you four make him out to be-" started Lily, but James cut her off. "Listen to me, Lily. I know you're hurting, for yourself and for Sniv-Snape", James hastily corrected himself, before continuing forward. "The truth is, what we did today, was not totally uncalled for. After what he and his friends did to Elena from Ravenclaw the other day, this had to be done and seeing that the staff did not have any evidence as to who actually did it, our grudge for them intensified, and today, well today we might've had the wrong intentions, but any time had we found them so much as try to tug at someone's hair without their permission, well, things would've gotten much nastier than they did today. So, you may or may not accept my apology for breaking your friendship, but I am not going to apologize for what we did to him. And before you reprimand us for how we did it, I'll just admit that we all know what we did was wrong, and it shouldn't have happened. And believe it or not, we've decided to, um- well, we've decided to stop all of this. Hexing people behind their backs just for the fun of it, I mean."

Lily stared at James for a long time after he ended his little speech, her eyes so wide the tears glistening in them reflected the firelight. Everything that he had said, even though she knew that James crossed the line every day for breakfast, that he would easily manipulate others for some elaborate prank, that lying to people for his amusement was second nature to him, everything he had said was so natural, so sincere it made Lily's heart melt.

James grew increasingly uncomfortable under Lily's wide-eyed gaze, and for a moment he feared she would slap him again for insulting her friends, for saying such nasty things about him, for mixing his name up with people who were pure evil. But what she did shocked him beyond anything that had happened that day. Lily leaned forward and- _hugged him_. Tightly. Very tightly in fact. "Uh, Lily, choking up here", James croaked, and Lily let out another laugh before breaking off the hug. Arms still around his neck, she looked at him with so much affection that James' heart sank. He could not believe that he had hurt this girl so bad, and she was still ready to forgive him.

"So, no more hexing people just for the fun of it?" Lily asked James softly. James smiled before shaking his head. "No more being purposefully mean to anyone?" Another nod. "And no more pranks?" Lily asked, smiling, knowing well enough that she was pushing it too far. And sure enough. "Whoa, whoa, whoa! You wanna rethink that missy", chided James playfully, and Lily let out another laugh. James soaked it all in, the way her head tilted back, and her nose wrinkled just a little. God, that laugh was becoming his favourite sound in the world.

As though suddenly becoming aware of the fact that her hand was still snaked around James, she let go quickly and cleared her throat.

Suddenly James said, "So seeing that you lost a friend because of us, and the fact that we have made some serious promises about our remaining time at Hogwarts, and the fact that being with us will very effectively get you through many locked doors, how would you like to have four more friends in your life?"

Lily bit her lower lip. Being friends with James Potter and the rest of the Marauders was the last thing she would've wanted so much as an hour ago. Well, except for Remus maybe, but the rest, not so much. Thoughts raced through her mind.

He is genuinely sorry for what he did.

But it wasn't the first time, he is constantly doing it.

But he promised that he would stop doing that.

But he is not going to change who he is just because of me.

But he really did feel sad for me while he was down here before me.

Knowing that having all these thoughts would get her nowhere, Lily decided to do something she hadn't done in a long time. She decided to do something she had gotten really sure she never should do again. She decided to act without thinking.

"James?" Lily called softly. His smile faded a little. "Yeah?"

"I would love to be your friend."

* * *

 **Finally! Spent a lot of time just trying to come up with this first chapter, kinda get why people find this so exhausting already. Don't know why I keep pointing this out, but- first try in writing series fanfiction guys, please don't forget to review. Also, I have a brief outline as to how the story is going to proceed, but any suggestions for the story are welcome as well.**


	2. Of New Beginnings

**So, yeah, chapter 2 came along pretty quickly, and I do have a pretty neat idea on how to proceed, so the upcoming chapters should not take up much time either. Enjoy! :)**

Chapter 2

Of New Beginnings

"You guys are- what now?"

"You ask me again, Marls, and I will skewer you with a quill," replied Lily, a sarcastic little smile plastered on her face.

They were out on the grounds by the lake, trying to soak in as much of Hogwarts as they could before the term ended and they had to leave for their summer vacations. This was one of Lily's favourite spots, a spot where they could just sit down, relax, gossip, tease, or just quietly watch the placidity of the lake. Today, however, seemed to be dedicated entirely to discussing the newly established dynamic between Lily and the rest of the Marauders; one certain Marauder more like.

"Fine, ginger, keep your head on," offered Marlene, sitting down leaning against a tree, the scowl on her face. Before Lily could retort, Alice sighed and said, "I can't believe you agreed to be friends with those four, I knew you were upset, but that upset..." Alice's voice broke off, but there was a smile on her face, a smile that only made Lily frown.

"You know there is no 'just me' in the picture, we all are going to be friends with them, right?" Lily quizzed, her eyebrows raised. To this, however, the girls just sniggered slightly. "We've always been friends with them, Lils," said Mary. "It's you who has always had a problem with them. Well, okay, Remus not so much, and James very much, but yeah, you nevertheless. I mean, I knew you were shaken up yesterday, but I never thought I'd see the day you would willingly become friends with James Potter-" It seemed that Mary was about to give an entire speech, but Lily cut her off.

"Look, can't you guys give it a rest. So, yes, Potter gave me a hard time, and for a very long time, agreed. And everything he did yesterday was beyond the definitions of just mean. But I slapped him yesterday, and really hard at that, and yet, he was still feeling guilty the whole time. You all didn't see him, he was genuinely sorry. And now that he is willing to change himself for one shot at our friendship, I think he deserves a second chance, don't you think?"

Everyone was silent for a moment before Marlene and Mary looked at each other and burst out giggling.

"What?" Lily snapped at them, while Alice just frowned at them quizzically.

"Oh, sweetie!" Mary exclaimed in between her giggles. "Remember a few months ago what Alica said about Frank being sorry, and how she had decided to give him a chance at 'friendship'. Didn't take time for it to bloom into a romance, did it?"

Alice blushed deeply, causing the other two to laugh even harder. Lily smiled herself, before catching the implications of Mary's words, and turning a deep shade of crimson herself.

"Nice colour on your cheeks there, Evans," came out a silky voice from behind her, and she turned around and caught sight of Sirius walking up and plopping down right beside her. "Really compliments your hair. Too much to assume that I was the one to bring that out?" She scowled at him.

"What do you want, Black?" "Come now, darling Lily," said Sirius, in that same silky, flirtatious tone. "No way to talk to your _friend,_ now, is it?"

Lily groaned inwardly. She had been afraid of the complications that came along with being friends with the Marauders. She had to be friends with _all_ of them. Including Sirius Black.

It seemed like Sirius was about to continue talking, much to Lil's dismay when he received a sharp blow to the back of her head. Both of them turned around to find Remus and Peter standing behind them, Remus looking at Sirius with annoyance, and Peter with amusement.

"What was that for?" Sirius asked indignantly, rubbing the spot where he had been hit. "For making Lily uncomfortable already," replied Remus, while moving towards the opposite side and seating himself against a tree, right beside Mary, who moved aside a little to make room, her cheeks a little pink. the girls shared a little smile. It was no big secret amongst them that Mary harboured some not-so-platonic feelings for Remus Lupin, though he, being a dorky boy that he was, was entirely unaware of it.

The smile on their faces, as though they knew something the Marauders didn't, was not lost on Peter, as he sat down as well, and asked, "Something we're missing here?"

"Brains by the look of it," replied Marlena, and the four girls burst out laughing. Peter, Remus and Sirius, rather than look insulted, had identical looks of amusement on their faces. "Impressive, Marls", complimented Sirius. "Quick insults of the tip of your tongue. Really impressive."

Lily looked around at their tiny little group and realised with a warm feeling that she actually enjoyed all of this. Sitting around with her friends, talking to James' was a fresh little feeling rather than sitting around with her friends and cursing the same. Which reminded her-

"Hey, where's James?" Lily asked, craning her neck and looking around. A moment too late, she realised what she had said, and stopped looking for James, and looked around her friends. Marlene and Sirius had sly 'caught-you-in-the-act' expressions on their faces, while Mary, Alice and Remus donned sweet little smiles. Peter, however, was looking from one to the other, wondering what just happened.

Lily tried to correct herself hastily. "I mean Potter, I didn't, um- I mean, I wasn't really, er- I was just thinking about-" She, however, was saved a response when Marlene leaned forward and whispered, "Lillykins, don't even try."

Her face red with humiliation, she didn't notice when a lean figure stepped towards their little group and sat down beside Marlene, putting an arm over her shoulder. "Moning, Marlene," greeted James flirtatiously, to which Marlene rolled her eyes. James shifted his gaze to Lily, who had her eyebrows raised at the sign of familiarity between James and Marlene. "Try what, Evans?" James asked, a mock-thoughtful expression on his face. Lily just smiled and shook her head, leaning back against the tree she was rested on.

"Well, seeing that this is-" Remus started speaking, but broke off abruptly, a dark expression on his face. James, Peter and Mary looked up as well, and the look on their faces matched Remus'.

Lily looked up to see what had caused this change in the mood, and her heart dropped a mile. Sirius turned around as well, and his hand immediately travelled to his wand.

Standing behind them, a complete picture of a mixture of hurt towards Lily and bitterness towards the rest, he asked in a low voice, "Lily, can I have a word?"

"You most certainly cannot," growled Mary, and Marlene reached out to grip her shoulder, even though her face was a mask of rage as well. As Lily saw James hand mirror Sirius' movement from a moment ago, she realised that this could turn ugly, and immediately stood up. "Guys, give us a minute," said Lily softly. "Lils, you don't have to-" started Alice, but Lily interrupted her. "It's fine Al." Then turning towards Snape, she added, "I can handle a little unpleasantness."

Snape's expression visibly paled at her words, but he said nothing. Moving away from their earshot, he tried to hold Lily's hand, but Lily drew back repulsed. Snape flinched but didn't try to take her hand again. In a blank voice, he said, "Lily, what happened yesterday shouldn't have happened. What you need to understand is what I said to you was under complete humiliation, and I didn't mean a word of it. If only Potter and his riff-raff of friends wouldn't have done what they did-" He stopped talking when Lily suddenly threw her head back and laughed humorlessly. "Oh, you have the guts, Severus, to try and rope off your blame, the fact that you called me something that was worse than hexing me, on to James and the rest-" "James?" Snape flared, and now there was real anger in his voice. "He is James now? After everything that he has done to me, and to you, the first thing you decided after breaking off our years-old friendship is to go to that man. Didn't you call him an arrogant toerag up until a day ago? And now this sudden change in your colours? You disgust me, Lily, how could you-" Snape's eyes widened as he realised what he had said. "No, Lily, that's now what I meant, I am so sorry."

Lily was taking deep breaths as she tried to control her anger. Never before had Severus ever so much as thought of speaking like this to her, which just made her realise how over the prospects of them ever being friends again were. Taking another deep breath in, she said, "I don't have to justify my actions to you, Severus. You've chosen your path, and I have chosen mine. Goodbye."

She walked back to her friends, not looking back at the dejected face of her friend.

* * *

All of them had decided to not ask Lily what had happened between her and Snape, as a result of which, by the end of the day, Lily was all packed, and cheerful again. Saying goodbye to all the parts of the castle they held most dear, the girls had come back and were resting in the common room, when the door burst open and in came the Marauders, with crates of butterbeer and bags of the very best of Honeydukes chocolates in their hand. One look at them and the entire common room had erupted into cheers. They set it down, and took a bow, before carrying everything over to the table near which the girls sat. They were all laughing, including Lily, who normally would've been annoyed at all the noise. This was not lost on Remus, who smiled at Lily, before passing her a butterbeer.

"You most certainly do not look like your usual self," observed Remus, and Lily laughed again. "Normally you would've been mad at all this, at us."

"Normally, Remus, I would not have realised how harmless, and rather fun in fact, all of this was over my annoyance at you four."

"And by you four, you mean my mate Prongs over here," said Remus, his smile widening. Lily felt her cheeks darkening and punched Remus lightly, frowning at how little it affected him. He gave her a warm smile. "I am glad we all are friends now."

Lily smiled back just as widely. "So am I, Remus."

"And so am I," said Sirius loudly, flinging his arm over Remus and Lily's shoulders, causing Lily to giggle, and Remus to roll his eyes. "A toast then, what say?" Sirius asked, raising his butterbeer.

"To the most unlikely of friendships, due to Lily-flower and Prongsie over here."

"Lily-flower?" Lily hissed at him in anger, but he merely flashed his cocky smile, causing her friends to roll around in laughter.

"To Lily and James finally having an opening for hitting it out," Sirius all but yelled, raising his drink. "Padfoot", growled James, but it was drowned amidst the sound of everybody chanting 'hear, hear', causing Lily to blush furiously.

"And to Marlene finally agreeing to go out to Hogsmeade with me!"

"Not happening, Black."

"Dammit!"

* * *

 **Next chapter is mostly going to be conveyed through different letters between the major characters, spanning the summer. Wish me luck! Oh, and don't forget to review.**


	3. Owl Posts

**So, this took a little longer than I expected, but I didn't know how to get this letters format right. I was hoping that there would be something that I could just conjure from, well, nothing to go on, but this is what I could salvage. Really hope you guys like it. Enjoy :)  
**

* * *

Chapter 3

Owl Posts

Moony,

Got the motorcycle. GOT THE MOTORCYCLE! This summer is going to be legendary. Can't believe you're still out there jerking off in France.

Padfoot

* * *

Moony,

So, Padfoot got his motorcycle.

Wanna place a bet on how long it takes before he gets bored and decides to enchant it. Mine's 15 days.

Prongs

* * *

Wormtail,

GOT THE MOTORCYCLE!

Come over, we're all ride it together (except Moony, idiot's still gone).

Padfoot

* * *

Padfoot,

And I'm very well too, thanks for asking.

As for the motorcycle, pretty sure you're gonna crash it in the first try itself, I know you around Muggle devices. But good luck anyways.

Missing you all.

Moony

* * *

Prongs,

10 days, 10 galleons.

Moony

* * *

Padfoot,

I'll be there in three days. DO NOT RIDE IT BEFORE I GET THERE, I'VE LEARNED SOME PRETTY GOOD HEXES!

Wormtail

* * *

Lily,

How are you?

Wow, it feels weird beginning a sentence like that after two weeks worth of conversations with the guys.

I am in France for the holidays, and I am enjoying it pretty well here. Anyways, since I haven't heard from any of you, and we're 'friends' now, I thought I'd let you in on a funny story. In fact, it is the single funniest one-liner you are ever going to hear.

 _Sirius got a motorcycle._

Laugh away.

Love,

Remus

P.S. Feel free to write to the others about Sirius' motorcycle, pretty sure Marlene's gonna love it.

* * *

Remus,

I am doing great, even better now that you've written to me. And the motorcycle is just the cherry on top.

No need to write to the others as we're all staying together for a while. And yes, you were right, the idea of Sirius trying to ride a muggle transporting device did have Marlene in splits. She thinks it's extremely weird that Sirius is going to be riding something that doesn't get off the ground. Speaking of which, you sure he isn't gonna try to bewitch it to fly?

It's really nice to hear you're enjoying yourself in France.

Maybe you should drop the others a letter, ask them to write to us sometimes as well.

Oh, and the 'friends' in quotations is not appreciated. You are gonna get hexed for that. Be ready.

Love,

Lily

P.S. James' owl entered the window literally the moment I was done signing my name. Funny, eh?

* * *

Lily,

How are you? I hope you are enjoying your summer so far because we sure have.

You will never believe what happened. Sirius got a motorcycle. It is UNBELIEVABLE! It's jet black and looks so smooth, even got a seat at the side, three people can sit at once. Almost makes up for the fact that it can't fly, though I am pretty sure that's not gonna be the case for too long

Haven't got a chance to write to the others, but Marlene's mom told my mom that you are all staying together. How's that like? Any bikini pillow fights? Humor me and say yes.

Missing you,

James

P.S. Why didn't you write for so long? Thought we were friends. I'm disappointed.

* * *

James,

You can't see me right now, but I am visibly pouting at your last comment right now. You took your time in writing to us as well.

I am great and summer's been excellent so far. As for the pillow fight comment, Mary is gonna bat-bogey you for that, you know that right?

And the motorcycle, well I can't be the only one who sees that's a disaster waiting to happen, right? I mean it's Sirius riding a motorcycle for Christ's sake! He is unsafe even on a broom, and he is the best seeker I know.

Anyways, I have to go, Marlene and Alice have started bickering again, and I can't write in peace with them yapping around.

 _Lily's hand flickered. What was she supposed to write? Love? 'Missing you', like James had done? Even she couldn't deny the exciting flutter she had felt in her stomach when she read it. Had he really missed him, even after being constantly surrounded by the excitement? Or was he simply being polite?_

 _Lily shook those thoughts off. She had signed it as 'Love' while writing to Remus hadn't she? Why would James be any different? Yes, that was it, 'Love' it was, and it wouldn't be weird. Why could it possibly be weird? She took a deep breath and brought the quill down to the paper._

Regards,

Lily

* * *

Moony,

9 days, 2 crashes, and he's done it. Good call. That's 10 galleons well deserved.

Prongs

* * *

Moony,

So, something went wrong with the motorcycle, and I had to have the bike bewitched. James' dad was more than willing to do it really. It was fun. So, anyway, long story short, not only do I have a motorcycle, I HAVE A FLYING MOTORCYCLE!

You didn't see me do it, but I just took a bow.

Padfoot

* * *

Moony,

You missed it! How could you miss it, man? Padfoot has got a flying motorcycle. Of all the stupid things. Just come back already, and we can all try flying it (though Mr and Mrs Potter have forbidden us to go anywhere beyond the grounds).

Wormtail

* * *

Lily-flower,

I hear you've been having bikini pillow-fights. Any chance you recorded it? Because if you did, all the fortune James has is yours.

Any-who, as you might have already heard, I have a FLYING MOTORCYCLE. That's right, and I even know how to ride it now, and all.

Hey, when do we see you guys next, I am really gonna get pretty bored if it's all the way till the start of the term. And you never write either. Disappointed, I am.

So much of love,

Sirius

* * *

Sirius,

Can you guys dial down on the 'not writing' part, I am sorry that I waited for you guys to write first, alright.

And yeah, I sort of saw the bewitching the motorcycle part of it coming, though I want to know who did it for you. As for the 'already heard' part, nah, I didn't know that you had enchanted it already. And I am not okay with that. I may not have written first, but I was serious (no bad puns, I beg of you) about being friends. So, I should've heard. I am literally huffing right now.

And yeah, I guess till the start of the term it is, I haven't spent enough time with my family this summer, and they are not okay with it. Well, everyone but my sister, and seeing that we ARE friends now, I'll tell you about it later. And tell the rest I am mad at them. Peter especially, he didn't write to me at all.

Love,

Lily

* * *

James,

"Any-who, as you might have already heard, I have a FLYING MOTORCYCLE. That's right, and I even know how to ride it now, and all. "

Care to explain what happened there, and why I 'haven't already heard'.

And while you do that, think about this. Mary's parents, they're dentists (a Muggle healer, specifically for teeth, actually), they have to leave for France immediately, and seeing that Mary has spent a better part of the month, and the vacations, away from them already, they want her to go with them. If that's not Cupid, I don't know what is.

Anyway, if she and Remus don't get together in the holidays, I am gonna stop believing in the concept of love. I mean can't he see it, her feelings are staring him right in the face, that git.

So, yeah, back to the _flying_ motorcycle. I want to know how that happened.

 _Lily bit her lip as she stared at her letter for a moment. Then smiling to herself, she bent down to continue._

Love,

Lily

* * *

 **So, yeah, that was what I came up with. Really don't know if it was good or bad, just published it without thinking. If you think it was good, then review. If you think it was bad, review anyway, and I'll try to improve, either the case. Chapter 4 out in a few days, hopefully by the end of this week. M'halo!**


	4. Back To Where We Belong

**Sort of went into a roll there after publishing Chapter 3, and, well, this happened. Came up with this pretty quickly, so if it seems a little hurried, I apologise for that. So, I am fairly satisfied with what I came up with, hope you like it as well. Oh, and yeah, I've got a few names for Beta reads, but they're not hardcore HP Fans, so if there are some out there, who don't mind a quick read of stuff before-hand, please let me know, and I'll try to get it through. Anyway, enjoy :)**

* * *

Chapter 4

Back To Where We Belong

Five minutes later, and Lily still couldn't stop laughing. "Second years- oh God!" She had to hold onto Remus for support. "The way they jumped apart-" Lily broke off yet again, guffawing loudly.

Remus looked at her, bemused. They were on prefect duty, patrolling the Hogwart's Express, and had caught two awkward second-years trying to kiss clumsily at the end of a carriage. One look at the two grown-up sixth years and they had run off in opposite directions, mollified. Remus and Lily had stood frozen for a moment before bursting out in splits. Lily, however, seemed to be taking more effort getting herself to stop than her fellow prefect.

"Why would you want to kiss someone in your second year?" Lily asked, a thoroughly amused expression on her face. "Practice, maybe?" Remus offered. "You don't need practice to kiss, it's meant to be spontaneous, not rehearsed," she contemplated. "Some of us might," he replied. Lily patted his arm. "I'm sure you're a wonderful kisser Remus," soothed Lily. Remus looked at her, a mock-frown on his face. "You offering to kiss me, Lily?" He quizzed.

This shut Lily up, and she slapped his arm. "You've become a lot more like James and Sirius than I'd have liked," she observed, to which he just laughed. Watching him at that moment, completely carefree, Lily decided to ask him something that had been eating at her for days.

Remus continued walking ahead before he was wheeled around by his arm to face Lily, whose smile had dropped and who was looking worried now. "What's wrong?" He asked, frowning himself. Lily bit her lip and her cheeks flushed a bright shade of red. "Do you- did James mean what he asked me by the lake that day?"

Remus smiled at her again. "Lily, that day he did a lot of things he may not have meant to do. That he did not mean to do. But I am sure he wouldn't have asked you out just for the fun of it. What I am sure of though, is that he is not going to do anything to jeopardize your newly established friendship."

Lily bit her lip, still looking anxious. Remus reached out and took her hand. "We wouldn't let him," he said reassuringly. Lily smiled at him, at the sincerity in his eyes, and felt at ease about the issue for the first time in days.

They let go each other's hands and proceeded forwards. "C'mon, the others might've saved us all seats at our usual compartment," said Remus, ushering Lily ahead. Lily frowned and said, "You know, I'll never know how you manage to get the same compartment every year, I mean, you guys aren't really the first to enter the train, you loiter around a fair share, and yet that compartment is always empty for you. How do you guys do that?"

Remus flashed him a Marauder-ish smirk, a look that annoyed Lily beyond reason, and her frown deepened. Remus smiled at her before answering. "Sirius and James come here before anyone else and add stinking charm to the compartment, and we remove it when we get there", he said in a matter-of-fact tone. Lily looked at him for a moment, before bursting out laughing. "I think I was a victim of that stinking once," Lily remembered. She shook her head. "You four are insane," she muttered, still smiling.

They reached the end of the aisle, and sure enough, everyone was in there, the Marauders, alongside Mary, Marlene and Alice. "Hello, everyone," greeted Lily and sat in the empty seat in between Alice and Sirius. Sirius instantly wrapped his arm around her shoulder. She frowned at him, but he just smiled at her, a genuine smile, not like his usual smirk, and Lily couldn't help but smile back.

Remus had seated himself beside Mary, and she automatically snuggled into him, causing every girl to smile sweetly, and James and Sirius to snort in mock-disgust. Peter simply laughed at everyone's reaction and leaned back further in his seat.

"So, how did rounds go?" James asked, not looking up. He was engaged in a wizarding chess match with Alice and seemed to be immensely concentrated, a look alien to his face. Remus and Lily pointedly looked away from each other to hide their smiles and he said, "Nothing out of the ordinary." James nodded, and stayed still for a moment, before breaking into a huge grin. Beside Lily, Alice started panicking. "Oh, no. No, no, no. James don't- Dammit!" She cursed loudly, as James' knight pounded her king. "Sorry, sweetie, no mercy in chess," James laughed. Alice made a face at him, and crossed her legs, huffing loudly.

"Hey, you see Frank yet?" James asked, and Alice looked up at him, forgetting her annoyance. Lily had to hand it to him, he was smart. "Yeah, right before we boarded, why?" She asked. "No, it's just- did he make the Captain this year?" James asked, the curiosity evident in his tone. "Oh, yeah, he did," replied Alice, a proud gleam in her eye. "He was really happy about that." James nodded, deep in thought. He shared a look with Sirius and shrugged. "Meh, who cares, we're gonna pound him anyways," James said casually and received a sharp kick to his shin by Alice, which in turn received laughter and cheering from the rest. "You will not insult my boyfriend again," she warned. "I wasn't insulting him," James replied indignantly. "I was insulting his team," he said. "And questioning his captaincy," he muttered under his breath.

"You really need to give the Quidditch insanity a break this year Potter," Lily said, chuckling. "Back to Potter, are we?" James quizzed. Lily simply frowned and said, "Well, it's just, 'James' feels a little funny rolling off my tongue. So, until I get used to it, little by little, Potter it is going to be." James nodded and said, "Fair enough, Evans."

Lily pouted at James, causing Peter to smirk. She leaned forward and smacked him on his head. "Ow, what was that for?" Peter asked indignantly. "For laughing at my incredibly attractive pout." She settled back for a moment, before leaning forward yet again and hitting him once more. He clicked his tongue in annoyance. "And that?" "For not writing all summer," Lily replied in a false-cheerful voice. Marlene smirked, causing Peter to glare at her. Before he could retort, however, the door opened and the newly anointed Head Boy, Amos Diggory stepped in. "Guys, we're reaching school a bit ahead of our usual schedule today, so you might want to put on your robes, yeah?" He smiled around at the lot before his eyes settled on Lily. His smile widened just a fraction, and he stared at her a little longer. Lily smiled back at him, feeling a blush creeping on her cheeks, and cursing herself for it.

As though just realising he had been staring at a girl in a compartment filled with her friends, he looked away, cleared his throat, and flashed them a polite smile one last time, before closing the door and disappearing.

There was total silence for a moment, before Marlene said, "Well, that was interesting." She was eyeing Lily with a sly smile on her face, and Lily blushed even deeper. "That colour goes with your hair, you know? Maybe we should keep that eye-candy around even more, huh?"

Everyone laughed as Lily gave her the finger, causing them to laugh even harder, and Marlene to mock-pout. "Now that was a sexy pout," stated Sirius, winking at Marlene. Marlene blew him a kiss, before getting up and picking her robes.

* * *

They entered the common room, tired after the journey, and sleepy after the heavy meal they'd just had. Sirius immediately slumped down on the couch. "Oh, no," said Remus. "None of that, you're not falling asleep on the couch, we have to drag you upstairs every time." "You're gonna have to drag me up even now", replied Sirius in a sleepy voice. James and Remus groaned before grabbing hold of either of Sirius' shoulder. Peter had already dragged himself upstairs. "A little hand, Lily?" James panted. Lily laughed. "To help you pick up Black and carry him off to bed. No, see, you adopted him six years ago, I didn't."

Marlene and Alice laughed, whereas Mary couldn't help herself from commenting, "Oh, but I bet if it was the marvellously gorgeous and hot Head Boy of ours, that would be perfectly fine for you to wrap your hands all around, would it not?"

Marlene and Sirius wolf-whistled before Sirius dropped back to his semi-dead state.

For some reason, Lily immediately looked at James as Mary said this. For a moment, there was something unreadable in his eyes, but if indeed it was what Lily feared, she became sure that she must've imagined it because the next moment he was guffawing alongside the rest. She sighed in relief, before remembering she was supposed to be scandalised and punched Mary in the arm.

"Well, anyway, Sirius' drooling is the queue for us to leave," heaved James. "Good night!" James and Remus said together, while Sirius muttered something incorrigible. The girls laughed and wished them good night. Turning back, as they made their way to their own dormitories, Lily tailing behind the rest, she blushed a little by herself when she realised, with a sudden jolt, that she had indeed found Amos to look _marvellously gorgeous and hot._

Had Lily stayed down for a moment longer, or had she turned around, she would've caught sight of James looking back at her, an expression on his face no quite placeable. As such, she didn't. And neither did James call out.

* * *

 **So, yeah, I decided to add a love triangle to spice things up. Look, if you're annoyed, I can't help it, it's the story I had in mind. Anyways let me know if it is a good idea, and whether you enjoyed the chapter, in the REVIEWS. Yep, I still expect you to do that, so please do. Work on Chapter 5 is underway. I'll write soon.**


	5. For Starters

**So very sorry this took so long to come, it's just holidays, and family and stuff. Let's just say I got a little busy. Anyways, here it is, the fifth chapter. Leave reviews and let me know how it came along. Enjoy :)**

* * *

Chapter 5

For Starters

"See, that's the thing," said Marlene in between her yawn. "Amidst thinking about everything you love about Hogwarts, you sort of forget about everything you hate about Hogwarts. Why, oh why, do we have to wake up so early?"

The others laughed at their friend's overreaction. It was no secret that Marlene was not a morning person, and it was all but polite to make her wake up early in the mornings. They were making their way downstairs to the Great Hall for breakfast when, turning around the corner, they came across Frank bent against the notice-board, trying to attach a parchment to it. Alice's eyes lit up immediately. "'Morning, sweetie, what're you doing here so early?" She enquired. Frank turned around and smiled at all of them before giving Alice a quick kiss. "Uh, nothing, I was just putting up the date of the trials for the Quidditch team," he explained. Lily frowned at him. "Isn't it way too early to be holding trials?" Lily asked, surprised. Frank merely laughed and pointed at the notice board. "Guess who else disagrees with that."

Lily leaned forward to read the notice Frank was pointing at and burst out laughing.

 _Gryffindor team selections this Saturday, on the whatever-eth it is. All prospective candidates to be present, with their OWN brooms, no one's borrowing Cindy for the practices._

 _(Signed) James Potter_

"Well, he's James, isn't he?" Mary explained, smiling to herself. "Talking about me McDonald?" A drawn-out voice replied from behind them. They turned around to see James and Sirius idling by the window of the corridor. "Yes, I was just explaining to Frank how being a Captain like you isn't something he should hope to be," teased Mary. James, however, seemed to take this to heart, as he jumped down from the windowsill, and gave her a highly exaggerated look of anger. "I will be in the Great Hall, awaiting your apology," he said faux-sternly, before marching to the hall. Sirius chuckled beside them. Lily turned to him and asked, "Hey, who's Cindy?" Sirius' grin widened, before:

"That, Lily-flower, is the name of James' Nimbus."

Lily stared at him disbelievingly. "Come off it, there's no way he named his broom." Sirius just shrugged and said, "Mine's Alexa. And she is HOT. Anyway, gotta go, we have something big lined up for tonight." He slung his bag over his shoulder and strut off to the hall.

"Can't believe you just became friends with those guys like that," said Frank shaking his head and smiling. "Anyways, I need to head down, you guys should too. McGonagall's probably down there giving the timetables."

The five of them made their way to the hall and strode off to their house tables- Frank to the Ravenclaw's and rest to the Gryffindor's. Getting there they sat down with the rest of the Marauders, something which received wide-eyed responses from eyes across the four tables. To see Lily Evans become friends with the Marauders was not something you saw every day, and while many people had seen them sitting by the lake and relaxing the last day of the previous term, a majority of the school were witnessing such a paranormality for the first time.

"Good morning people," greeted Mary, sitting down beside Remus. Remus, however, ignored her completely, to everyone's surprise. Mary raised her eyebrows. "What's wrong?" She asked. Remus sighed before looking at James, who merely nodded, a wide, goofy smile on his face. Remus shook his head before replying quietly, "James has stolen all of my chocolates, ergo I am not allowed to talk to you before you apologize to him."

There was a moment's silence before the entire group burst out laughing. Remus glared at Mary. "It's not funny, I really like those chocolates, got them from France." Mary hiccoughed herself back to silence before clearing her throat and saying, "James, I am profoundly sorry for saying that your captaincy reign as the Gryffindor Quidditch captain was anything short of inspiring."

James seed to consider this for a moment, and then shrugged and said, "I can live with that." He turned back to his pie.

"Um, Prongsie? You wanna get hexed?" Remus asked, a fake-smile on his face, and his hands on his wand. James looked up, an expression of innocence on his face. "Hmm?" Remus sighed exasperatedly. "My chocolates," Remus replied, his voice threateningly low. "Oh, yeah, about that," said James. "Sirius has them," he ended and went back to his breakfast, a smile on his face. "I am sorry, WHAT?" Remus hissed.

"Mr Lupin, I assume you have some business being so furious at Mr Potter," came a stern voice from behind them. Sirius groaned, before turning around to come face-to-face with- "Professor McGonagall, none at such-" He was cut off by the teacher. "Mr Lupin, you are very well aware that you can give him detentions, you're at the liberty to do that since I can't imagine Mr Potter being exactly 'innocent'," she commented before handing them their timetables, and giving James and Sirius one last suspicious glance, headed ahead.

"You guys need to be careful this yea-" Mary began to say, but stopped abruptly. Lily turned around to see what had caused Mary to stumble, and turned back immediately, her face scrunched up, knowing that the teasing was going to start a little too early in the morning. Marching up to them, Amos tugged at his robes so that the 'HB' batch was clear and greeted everyone. Then turning to Remus he said, "Um, Lupin, I wanted to ask a favour of you." Remus sat a little straighter and asked, "Sure, Diggory, what's up?"

"Um, well, you see, this is my last year, and I thought I might want to get back to playing Quidditch. I mean I used to play until I injured my arm in the fourth-year. Anyway, seeing that I want to make a return, I'm going to have to practice a little harder. Which is why I was hoping you and Lily could take over the attendance supervision. I can, in turn, take up your rounds. If you both are okay with that." Remus shrugged at that and looked at Lily, who just looked up at Amos and nodded briefly, cursing herself for blushing at that moment.

Amos beamed at them. "Great! It's settled then. We can start it next week. See you guys around, then." Before he could leave, however, James called out to him. "Hey, just a second Diggory." Amos turned around. James leaned forward and asked, "Attendance supervision isn't really a two-man job, are they?" Amos frowned for a moment before saying, "No I guess they're really not. Why?" James settled back on his seat, and a sly grin was appearing on his face.

Lily recognised that grin, and her eyes widened immediately as she realised what he was doing. Shaking her head frantically, while doing her best to make sure Diggory didn't notice, she aimed a kick at him from under the table but caught Sirius instead. James' smile widened before he added to Amos, "Well, how about Remus does the attendance thing-y by himself, and you can take up _his_ rounds. You know, do it with Lily."

Everyone around them was smiling now, everyone but Lily who was staring at her fork blushing furiously, wondering when she'd get the chance to insert it in Potter's gut. Amos just smiled and said, "Well, yeah, if Lily is okay with that."

Everyone's eyes turned towards Lily, who all but squeaked out an 'okay'. Amos laughed and walked away, causing Lily to blush harder, as everyone around her broke out in laughter. "Never thought you could play Cupid this well, Prongs," said Peter, laughing. Lily glared at James before kicking him, actually getting him this town. "Not cool, Potter," muttered Lily gally. "C'mon ickle Lily," said Sirius. "Admit it, you cannot wait for next week. It's written all over your face, you have a crush on that disciplinarian dick." He leaned forward and nudged her. "Huh? A little bit excited? Uh-huh?"

Everyone laughed again, and this time Lily couldn't help but join in, swatting Sirius' arm aside. If she was being totally honest with herself, she really was extremely excited, the conversation had filled her stomach with some buzzing butterflies. Bending her face down so no one could see her blush, she pretended to eat, while thinking about how Amos' laugh had made her stomach back-flip and somersault in all weird ways.

* * *

"Prongs, a word?"

James had just walked into his dormitory, to find Sirius, Remus and Peter already there, looking as though they had been waiting for him. He frowned and said, "Sure, Pads, what's up?" Sirius glanced at Remus before asking, "James, what are you doing?" James raised his eyebrows. "What do you mean?" Remus sighed before speaking. "James, less than two months ago you had feelings for Lily, now you're trying your best to set her up with someone else. Care to explain?"

James sighed. "I know, but it was an extremely stupid thing to do, asking her out by the lake that day. And if she is willing to get past that and be friends with me, I sure as hell am not gonna let the feelings get in the way of it. It'll work out for the best, I'm sure it will."

Everyone was silent for a moment before Peter got up and patted James on the back. "Good show, mate, I'm proud of you." "Thanks, Pete," James replied, laying back down on the bed. Remus and Sirius gave each other one last glance, but decided not to comment. Patting James on the back, they strode off to their own respective beds, and James pulled the drapes shut.

Now alone to himself and his thoughts, his mind travelled back to this morning and the conversation they had had with Diggory. He remembered Lily's reactions and a goofy smile spread on his face. That girl really was something.

As he put his hands behind his head as he stared at the top of his four-poster bed, absentmindedly tracing patterns on his hair. He had meant everything he had said to Remus and Sirius a few moments ago. He wouldn't risk his friendship with Lily for anything. And besides, Amos being with Lily didn't make him uncomfortable a bit. And that was a good thing. It meant it would be all the more easier to help him get over the feelings he had for Lily up till the end of last year.

He turned around to lie on his side and sighed. Sometimes, being friends with someone was much more trouble than it was worth, he thought.

Truer words have never been said. Or thought.

* * *

 **And that's it. The end of the fifth chapter. Again, please leave reviews and let me know whether the story is going on enjoyably or not. Next chapter up in a little while.**


	6. Rounds Of Merry

**And this is it. So very sorry for making you guys wait, I know it might seem as if I neglected the story, but that's not it. I was just suffering from a huge case of writer's block. I know, in chapter 6 it's kinda embarrassing, but I had a picture of how the story was going to go, but nothing along with it. Anyway, this is what I came up with. Enjoy:)**

 **P.S. This chapter is all Lily and Amos, please don't hate me for it.**

* * *

Chapter 6

Rounds Of Merry

"Hey, Lily!"

"Hey Amos," Lily greeted back.

There was a moment of nervous silence before Amos cleared his throat. "So," started Amos, dragging out the vowel. "You ready?"

Lily raised her eyebrows. Was she ready? Was she ready to spend an hour walking around with a guy she harboured some major not-so-platonic feelings for? Was she ready to make an embarrassed fool of herself as soon as things went the tiniest bit south? Was she ready to make flustered small talk with the most handsome boy of the seventh year?

"Lead the way."

"So tell me, how was your summer?" Amos asked conversationally. Lily raised an eyebrow at him and he gave a nervous laugh. "Hey, just trying to make small talk here," he added defensively, and Lily joined him in his laughter. "It was fine, I guess," she replied. "My friends came over and that was pretty fun. We enjoyed it."

Amos nodded solemnly. They walked silently for a while before Lily spoke up. "So, how's Quidditch practice going?" Amos' eyes lit up at that and Lily internally rolled hers. _What is it with boys and Quidditch?_ "It is great, great I tell you, to be back on the pitch after so long. I mean, I've been practising by myself for a while, but it's awesome to be flying out there with the rest of the team. We're good too, but we obviously need a lot of practice if we want to win this year, Potter and Rookwood have got some serious nasty teams under their wings."

Lily smiled at his enthusiasm as he talked a little more about Quidditch. He might be the Head Boy, but she knew from experience that boys developed some really childish excitement for Quidditch. Potter and Black, for instance. Not once, in all the years Lily had spent with them, had she seen those two as serious about anything as they were in Quidditch. How they managed to get good grades all the time was beyond her.

"Uh, Earth to Lily?"

"Huh?" Lily asked, distracted. Amos stared at her, an amused smile on his face. "You blanked out right now, didn't you?" Lil's cheeks flushed a little. "No, I was just- well, I was"- she broke off and sighed. "Yeah, I blanked out. I am so sorry, it's just that Quidditch talk bores me. It's only fun watching out in the stands."

Amos chuckled lightly. "What about flying? You don't fly?" Lily gave a small laugh of her own before she replied, "No I do not." Amos frowned at her. "Why not?" He inquired. Lily shrugged and answered, "Fear of heights. I think. I never was comfortable with a broom." Amos clicked his tongue. "You have to get on a broom once more"- Sensing where this was going, Lily cut him off. "No, I do NOT," Lily said firmly, as though that settled the matter. Amos sighed defeatedly and Lily couldn't stop the smile from creeping up on her face.

* * *

"You don't really have to walk me back all the way to our common room," Lily told Amos as they climbed the stairs to make their way to the Gryffindor commons. "I know," answered Amos casually but did not stop walking. Lily smiled inwardly. Apparently, chivalry wasn't only a Gryffindor trait.

"Here we are," Lily said quietly as they stopped in front of the Portrait Hole. "Here we are," repeated Amos in a whisper. "Goodnight, then, Lily," he bade her, before reaching forward and kissing her swiftly on the cheek. Lily's breath hitched and her eyes widened just the tiniest amount. He smiled at her before starting to make his way back down the stairs. "Good night, Amos," whispered Lily softly, and walked inside.

* * *

"Hey!"

"Hey, back."

"You ready?"

"Lead the way."

* * *

"So I'm rushing down to Potter and Black, all furious and hair flying outwards, and I can feel the blood rushing to my face when suddenly I am stopped by a very apologetic looking Remus. The next thing I know, my hair is the sickly greenest shade you can imagine."

Amos laughed out loudly and Lily glared at him. "It's not funny, I couldn't get the color of my head for a week," Lily said reproachfully, causing him to laugh even harder. She slapped him in the chest, albeit smiling herself. "Can't believe you became friends with those guys," Amos said sobering up. "Yeah, neither can I," muttered Lily, causing him to burst into another round of laughter, and she joined him this time.

"What's it like anyway?" Amos asked, turning to Lily. She frowned at him. "What's what like?" He shrugged and replied, "You know. Hanging out with the Marauders." Lily cocked her head sideways thoughtfully. "It's pretty neat, to be honest. I mean, we don't 'hang out' per se, but I am just thankful we don't spend all the time fighting anymore. Don't know if it'll last though?" Amos frowned at her. "Yout thought process is apocalyptic," he observed, and she laughed out at that. "Why's that?" She inquired. "You know, if you guys blow it out of proportions now, I do not want to imagine the extra amount of work I am gonna get, along with all the teachers, to keep your battle at bay."

"We aren't that bad," she said indignantly. He raised an eyebrow, to which she merely shrugged and said, "Well, I am not that bad, Potter is."

* * *

"So, here we are," said Lily as they got to the portrait of the Fat Lady. "Here we are," agreed Amos. He looked at Lily and smiled, before reaching forward and kissing her cheek. "Good night," he whispered. She smiled up at him. "Good night," she replied, just as quietly.

* * *

"So, did you hear about the Weird Sisters concert last night?" Amos asked Lily in between their rounds. Lily looked up at him in surprise. "Yes, I did. Though I couldn't have guessed you did," she replied. Amos frowned at her. "Why's that?" He enquired. Lily shrugged and said,"You just didn't strike me as an alternative music fan."

Amos chuckled lightly. "My father loves music," he explained. "All sorts of them, and I kinda got the infatuation for music from him." They silently walked for a while, before Amos gave a bark of laughter. Lily looked at him strangely. "What?" She asked, amused. "Okay, so this one time," began Amos, a laugh still playing on his lips. "I was ten and me and my dad were doing our own rendition of Three Trolls of Trent, and at one point my dad's ukulele went haywire. I guess one of the strings came off or something. Anyway, I figured my dad would stop immediately, because of this horrible high-pitched screeching sound. But he didn't, he just looked shocked for a moment, before this sly grin appears on his face, and he starts playing it louder than ever. Next thing you know, my mom comes running in, her eyes wide and face sweaty. She had gotten all scared, she thought someone was being murdered or something."

At this point, Lily and Amos were both doubled up in laughter. Her arms traveled to his shoulder for support, and for the tiniest of moments, she could've sworn she felt it stiffen.

Sobering up, Lily looked at him. "You have any siblings?" He shook his head before he replied, "My parents didn't want any kids at the beginning of their marriage. They are both ambitious Ministry workers. But they soon figured that their lives seemed a little... incomplete. And so, they got me."

Lily laughed at that. "You sound as if you're some trophy or something." He smiled before turning to her. "You've got any siblings?" He asked, and Lily's smile wavered a little bit. "A sister," she replied at length. Amos raised an eyebrow, clearly asking her to elaborate. She sighed before adding, "We don't get along that well. She isn't really that fond of magic. Ergo, she isn't too fond of me."

He frowned. "Hard to imagine," he said. "What is?" She asked him. He gave her a dazzling smile. "Not being too fond of you."

Lily looked down and smiled, this time not even trying to stop herself from blushing.

* * *

"Why would you need to kiss someone as thirteen-year-olds?"

They had just encountered a rather uncomfortable sight at one of the deserted classrooms on the second floor of the school. A pair of third years had been making out right there, and boy did it make for a disturbing sight!

"Thank you," Lily exclaimed, a tone of victory in her voice. They walked ahead for a moment in silence, before she noticed that Amos was giving him a funny look. "What?" She asked defensively. "Um- you want to tell me why I was just thanked."

Lily frowned before realization dawned. It had been Remus with her rounds that day. "Wait- you're telling me I haven't told you about our rounds at the Hogwarts Express this year?"

Amos shook his head. She gazed at him for a moment before bursting out laughing. "What?" He asked, clearly amused. "Oh, you're gonna love this," she explained, sobering up just a little, before bursting out into another round of giggles.

"What?!" He asked again, trying to sound annoyed but being unable to stop himself from laughing. Her laughter really was infectious.

"Okay, so I and Remus are taking rounds…"

* * *

"Is everything okay?" Amos asked Lily. It was nearing the end of one of their rounds, and Lily had hardly spoken to him. "Hm? Yeah, everything's fine. Why?" She asked him, her eyes just a little wide. Amos raised his eyebrows at her. "Lily, we spend quite a bit of time every day. Don't take me for a fool. Just tell me what happened."

Lily looked down, and there was the slightest bit of tremor in her voice as she spoke. "Pot- James and I got into a fight today."

Amos looked at her sadly. He had come to realize what their newfound friendship meant to her. "Was it bad?" He asked softly.

Lily smiled and shook her head. "That's the thing, it really wasn't. It was just some stupid topic on Transfiguration, and we sort of blew it out of proportion. It was like old times. I mean, I know this isn't gonna last and we're gonna go back to being normal tomorrow. Or as normal as we could be."  
She sighed, and Amos could tell she was holding something back. "I sort of enjoyed it," she said at length. Amos frowned at her and she explained, "I enjoyed that banter. I just- a lot has changed, and I don't like changes. So, when we fought, it was my own comfort zone, and I felt more than happy to snuggle back into it."

He nodded as comprehension dawned on him. "But he didn't."

Lily shook her head, as a tear slipped from her eye. "He didn't. I couldn't tell then, but it hurt him. Our fight. He didn't want it one bit. And I couldn't tell. Some friend I am."

Amos reached his arm out and intertwined her hands with his. "You can always apologize, you know." Lily nodded. "I do," she whispered at length. "And I will," she added a little more strongly. "Only if he does though," she added defiantly, "He was being more unreasonable than I was." Amos shook his head, laughing, happy that there were finally the traces of a relaxed Lily. "Thought you couldn't even remember the fight?" He questioned, amused, to which she stuck her tongue out at him. "Whose side are you on, anyway?" She questioned, annoyed, causing him to break out into another bout of laughter.

Lily chuckled alongside him. Her mind was in overdrive. She couldn't stop thinking about the fight with James. She couldn't stop thinking about how he had looked after it. She couldn't stop thinking about how Remus and Alice had tried to get them to calm down, but neither had paid the slightest heed. She couldn't stop thinking about how she couldn't even remember what it was their fight had begun on. She couldn't stop thinking about the fact that she needed to James as soon as she could.

And for the love of her, she couldn't stop thinking how great it felt to have Amos' hands on hers.

* * *

"So, here we are," said Lily quietly, as they stepped towards the Gryffindor common room. She stopped in front of the portrait hole and looked at Amos, waiting for the good night wish and kiss. However, he looked a bit unnerved.

"What's wrong?" She asked him, concerned. He took a deep breath and said, "So, the year's first Hogsmeade trip is the next weekend."

Lily's heart fluttered. Could this be what she thought it was?

"So, do you have any plans?" He asked nervously, causing her to laugh. "You know I don't," she said softly. "Right. Well, um- I was wondering if you'd maybe- er, like to go out with me, then."

He was staring fixedly at the ground. Lily slowly reached an arm out and pulled his neck upwards so that she could look him in the eye. "I would love to," she whispered. His face broke into a huge grin, and she mirrored the expression. "Good night Amos," she whispered. He reached forwards, but instead of the cheek, placed a chaste and tender kiss on her lips. "Good night, Lily," he whispered back, before flashing another smile and turning to walk towards the staircase.

Lily wore a huge smile on her face as she gave the password to the Fat Lady and entered the common room. She was going out with Amos. _She was going out with Amos._ Nothing could ruin this moment for her.

Or so she thought.

Lily had entered the common room to a lot of weird things. She had entered the common room to a lot of funny things. But never had she entered the common room to something that would anguish her as such, a sight she had never ever seen before.

Beside the fire, his head leaning against the wall, a defeated expression on his face, sat a broken Remus Lupin.

* * *

 **So that's it. End of the sixth chapter. So sorry this took so much of time, but I did put a lot of thought into it so I really hope you enjoyed it. Well, let me know if you did or didn't in the reviews. Next chapter, anyways, is all about Remus and his werewolf storyline. Mostly going to pick up the lore from Pottermore, will publish it soon. Till then, love and regards.**


	7. Wolf Among The Sheep

**Before getting ahead with this chapter, there are a few things I really think I should clear out. Firstly, I picked up the history of Lyall Lupin and Remus' bite from Pottermore. The events are headcanon, but the story and characters are all canon-based. Also, there aren't going to be any detailed chapters on Sirius' prank on Severus, because according to the original, Rowling's story, all those events took place in the fifth year, and well, as you'll know if you've read the previous chapters that, well, all is forgiven, as Sirius and the rest are pretty tight. This is also the only chapter dedicated entirely to Remus' wolf history.**

 **And that's pretty much it. Presenting, the tiniest bit proudly, the seventh chapter. Enjoy.**

* * *

Chapter 7

Wolf Among The Sheep

 _Halloween. It's a beautiful time of the year. Kids running around in costumes, grown-ups ready with candies. Wonderful feasts, glorious decorations. The excitement is so goddamn contagious. It seeps into your pulse, your brain soaks in all the bright lights and the yells of elation, as your heart takes in all the laughter and happiness. Beautiful, yes, oh-so-beautiful!_

 _Of course, little of that matters when you are so deep towards the North, that the only yells you heard were those of sheer madness, terror and pain. As the violent waters of the great, dark North Sea crash into the rocks of the island, basking in their own craziness. The rocks, greyed in all the places they shouldn't have, forming ungodly patterns on the ground, led to the stone walls, walls standing feets high in the air._

 _The outside world, the laughter, the cheers, the elation, the excitement means little to nothing when you are surrounded by infestations of the worst possible curse on humanity. Happiness means little when you are locked up in Azkaban._

* * *

 _"What's taking so long?" Lyall Lupin questioned irritatedly, marching in through the creaking door into the dark questioning room. Nearly the very moment he entered, he swore and removed his wand from his pocket. "Your Patronus is getting weak, kid," he said to the young recruit quietly. The young man stuttered, sweat beads breaking out on his forehead. Lyall gave him a small smile before asking, "What's your name?" "Um, Cornelius Fudge, sir," replied the young man. "First trip to Azkaban, Cornelius?" Lyall enquired, taking out a pipe and lighting it with his wand. 'Yes, sir," Cornelius replied. "Nothing quite like it, is there?" A thick voice called out from the doorway. "Alastor," Lyall greeted softly, extending his arm to the auror. Alastor reached out and shook it and grunted out a response. Lyall smiled to himself. Even at a young age, Alastor Moody had gotten a little too hostile to the outside world than anyone would care to like. It did not come without good cause, however, for he was one of the most talented the Department had and had faced more dark wizards than most of the senior aurors ever would._

 _"So," he barked out at Fudge, who wavered a little, but stood his ground, quite a feat considering the man he was facing. "First time to the prison, eh?" He questioned, to which Fudge nodded. "No one forgets the first time," Moody grunted. "Don't worry, I promise the Dementors won't be gentle."_

 _The others present in the room gave tiny laughs. It was obvious, however, that they were absolutely terrified of being in such proximity to the Dementors. Cornelius, however, managed a smile and shook his head. Moody narrowed his eyes at him. "You are really confident for a first timer," he observed quietly. Cornelius' smile widened the tiniest bit, and Moody grunted in approval. "You're braver than a fair lot," he said, in a tone that almost sounded affable. "You'll go far," he said, sitting down in the chair beside the fire that was burning. "Take care of the Patronus, though," he barked, his voice back to the thick, frightening tone, and Lupin couldn't help but smile as Fudge's Patronus wavered a little in his fear. "What about you?" Asked Lyall turning to Alastor. "I heard you were offered the position of the Head once Rowle retires. That's promising for someone as young as you." Moody smiled a little at that. "Like hell, they're ever getting me to sit behind a desk. No, I belong out there. Fighting. That's how I've worked, and that's how I'll die." Lupin nodded, sitting down. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that," he said quietly. Moody's expression darkened. "What is the name of the man we're dealing with today, anyway?" "Greyback, Fenrir," answered an inspector, reading the name off a parchment. "Should be here any minute."_

 _Almost on cue, they heard footsteps, accompanied by a chafing sound, unmistakably that of a person being dragged through the floor. The door opened and two guards came in, their Patronuses ablaze so as to keep the Dementors away. They saluted Moody and Lupin, and then, dropping the convict in an empty chair, marched back to take their position by the door._

 _Lupin moved towards the accused. He was dressed in ragged clothes. Ragged, muggle clothes. Lupin frowned. Why was he dressed up as a muggle tramp, again? "What's he accused of?" He asked the inspector who had provided the name, and he opened the parchment again. "Greyback, Fenrir. Possible werewolf, accused off attacking and murdering twins Linda and Daisy Parker, muggles, aged seven." "Jesus," Lupin swore under his breath. "What kind of monster attacks seven-year-olds?" He spat in disgust. Pointing his wand at the unconscious man, he chanted, "Enervate." Immediately, the man stirred and sat up a little straighter, groaning loudly. Then looking at Lupin, who still held his wand out, his eyes widened in terror. "What the- who the hell are you? What do you want? Where am I? What is_ that?"

 _"That?" Moody asked incredulously. "Going to pretend you have never seen a wand before? That's a first." "Wand?" Greyback asked, frowning and looking at the wand in question. Two workers muttered to themselves from behind him, and he turned around, his arms flailing hysterically. "Who are you? All of you? What do you want from me?" Grabbing his shoulder, Lupin pulled him back to the chair roughly. Greyback whimpered, his eyes widening in terror. "Lupin," one of the men called out to him, his voice hard. Lupin, however, ignored him completely. "Don't play stupid with me you swine. You are a werewolf, not fooling anyone with this muggle act." Greyback stared back at him. "A were"- his voice faltered. Then, suddenly, he was up on his feet. His face was an inch away from Lupin's. "Listen, mate," he hissed violently. "I don't know who you think you are, why you have me here, or what you want from me. But I suggest you stop playing games with me. My wife knows where I work, and if I'm not home by midnight, she'll call the"- his rant may have continued, if it weren't for Lupin's fist the made contact with his face._

 _Greyback staggered, while everyone stared at Lupin, stunned. He was known to be, throughout the ministry, as one of the most amiable people. Such violence was not simply unusual, it was unprecedented._

 _"You killed two little girls," he hissed at Greyback, his voice laced with bitterness and malice. "You killed them, and if you think you can get out of it by acting, I will throw you out to the Dementors without a trial."_

 _"That is ENOUGH!"_

 _Lupin looked up, as a young Ministry worker stepped ahead from the darkness. His jaw was clenched and his body tensed. He was glaring hard at Lupin. "Look at him," he whispered furiously. "Look at how he is dressed. Does he look remotely like a wizard to you, let alone a werewolf? Did you- did he even have a wand on him?" He asked, turning to the guards at the door, who shook their heads._

 _Lupin stood up straight slowly. "What's your name, son?" He asked the young man. "Crouch. Bartemius Crouch," he answered defiantly._

 _"Crouch? From Magical Law Enforcement?" Lupin enquired, and Crouch gave a brief nod. "Well, Mr Crouch," Lupin began. "This man is a monster. A werewolf. A soulless, evil, pitiful creature, who deserves nothing but death. But you think he's a muggle? Fine, then let me say this." He walked up to the table and picked up his previously discarded pipe. Lighting it up again, he took a deep drag and said, "Full moon's coming up tomorrow. I say we keep him in custody till then. And then we'll know for sure."_

 _There was a moment's silence, which was broken by Crouch's laugh. "With all due respect, sir, but you are from the Department of Control and Regulation of Magical Creatures. It really isn't you call whether someone should or should not be detained."_

 _"Barty," Moody growled from the corner, his tone threatening. Crouch raised his hands defensively. "I really don't want to do this, but neither is it yours, Alastor. I am sorry, but this man is not staying here anymore." Turning to the inspectors at the doorway, he ordered, "Take him back. Take him to the shore, wipe his memory clean, and then take him back to where you picked him up from. And that'll be it."_

 _The guards took hold of Greyback and started dragging him back to the gateway. "Wait, what do you mean 'wipe my memory'?" He yelled out. "What are you going to do to me?"_

 _The guards, however, did not stop and dragged the man out, his yells echoing through the dark hallway._

 _There was a moment of silence, which was cleared out by one of the officials clearing his throat. "Well," he began. "Let's call it a night. It's a festive season, and we have spent half of it in the single most wretched place on the face of the earth, alright. Let's just lea"-_

 _The rest of his sentence was drowned by a blood-curdling scream from somewhere near the door. Immediately, they heard the rustle of the Dementors' cloaks, who were undoubtedly excited by the heightened emotions._

 _"PATRONUSES OUT. NOW!" Crouch yelled as he ran towards the staircase, casting one of his own. The others followed, and the corridors lit up with the brightness of their spells. The heavy footsteps echoed as the officials ran down the stairs-_

 _Only to be stopped in their tracks by the sight they witnessed._

 _The ministry ship was fast sailing away from the island, and by the look of it, was obviously unmanned. At the shore, however, was the proof._

 _At least half a dozen bodies lay on the rocks, their bodies ripped apart, unmistakable signs of extremely dark magic. Blood was still oozing out from the countless cuts on their bodies, a sickly shade of black and red, their limbs broken and hanging awkwardly by the sides, their mouths agape and blood polling under it._

 _"Holy Merlin," muttered Crouch, his eyes wide in horror._

 _Holy Merlin pretty much defined it._

* * *

 _Ministry ships had arrived. Reports were taken. Fenrir Greyback was officially a criminal on the run from the Ministry._

 _Slowly, Moody walked up to Crouch, who was seated on a rock, his head hung low. "See, I know Lupin," he grunted out at Crouch, whose head jerked up at once. "I know that he is not the kind of man who would walk up to you now and say 'I told you so'." He sat down beside Crouch. "So I will," he barked out. Crouch looked down, unable to meet Moody's gaze, who continued. "What happened today shouldn't have happened. You let your pride get in your head. You let a monster loose. You weakened a country today, Crouch. Sweet dreams."_

 _Crouch swallowed thickly, as Lupin called out to them. "Moody, Crouch. I am headed back. You coming with me on the ship?"_

 _Moody grunted as he sat up, and Crouch followed him silently._

 _"You would've done it, wouldn't you?" Crouch asked quietly. Lupin and Moody looked at him, and he cleared his throat before continuing. "You would throw him to the dementors, without any trial, if you had the chance?"_

 _Lupin gave him a stony look. "Hypotheticals, son. But even if I did, he would've deserved it."_

 _Crouch silently nodded at him. Lupin reached out and patted his shoulder, before turning back and walking away._

 _At that moment, Lyall Lupin didn't realise he had made the biggest mistake of his life. However, he was soon to._

* * *

"Remus!"

In four quick strides, Lily was kneeling down beside Remus, whose head snapped up instantly. "Lily," he asked, frowning. "What are you doing here?"

"Wha- I was out for rounds, what are you doing- Remus, what happened?"

Remus groaned as he sat up.

"Nothing, I'm sorry if I alarmed you, it's nothing to worry, really." He began to move away quickly, but Lily grabbed him by his arm and yanked him back down. "Oh, no, you don't," hissed Lily, her shock now giving his way to anger. He was sitting like this, leaning against the fire, in an empty common room, his face a mask of sadness, and it was nothing to worry about? How thick did he think she was?

Remus fell back down, his eyes wide. "Whoa- what?!"

"You tell me what is going on right now, Remus John Lupin," Lily demanded hotly. Remus sighed. "Really, Lily, it's nothing"- but Lily broke her off. "Sure isn't," she muttered, rolling her eyes. "Okay, can it wait"- "No, it cannot."

Remus stared at her determined expression, before sinking back down. "Well, Mary asked me out for Hogsmeade today."

"And?"

Remus sat back up straighter. "Wait- you knew she was going to?" Lily rolled her eyes again. "Remus, everyone knew, it was kinda obvious. And you know, you really bonded in France and"-

Lily's voice trailed off and her eyes widened. "Wait- you didn't, you didn't say no to her, did you?"

Remus looked at her dejectedly, before nodding slowly. There was a moment of tense silence, before-

" _You. Complete. Arse. Remus. Lupin."_ Lily punctuated every word with a blow to Remus, who cowered under her, his hands over his head to shield himself from her punches. "Ow, _bloody ow,_ woman, control yourself."

"I can't believe it," Lily said, as she sat back straighter. "You said no- I thought you liked her." Remus sighed and looked away. There was a moment's silence, in which she observed him. There were lines of worry on his face, lines that made him look so much older than he was. And he was in pain, she could tell that much. He was in deep pain, and he was trying to hide it. And that was what worried her the most.

She reached out and placed a hand on his cheek. "Remus, talk to me," she said softly. He looked at her, and though he remained silent, his eyes spoke volumes. She could tell that he was afraid of something, like he was calculating something that could make a heavy impact. Then, very slowly, he removed her hand from his cheek and leaned back. "She shouldn't be with me," he whispered.

Lily frowned at him. Was he being intentionally cryptic? "Why not?" She enquired. "She, just- she shouldn't," Remus replied enigmatically, before getting up. Lily, however, was not satisfied with his answer.

Moving quickly in order to block his way, she halted him in his tracks. "Wait," she ordered, and he complied defeatedly. She took a deep breath to compose herself. "Look, Remus. I know you like her, I have seen the way you look at her. She even told me that you got really close while you were in Paris. And she likes you, trust me, she has liked you way too much since third-grade when you helped her with the boggarts lesson, so why can't"-

"She deserves better," Remus interjected, and Lily continued over him. "And then you're giving such bullshit reasons like his, I mean, get off it, even you're not that noble. You're hiding something, and I want to know what it"-

"I am too dangerous for her."

Lily stopped mid-rant, her eyes widening and breath hitching. "What?!" She whispered incredulously, moving closer to him. He, however, stepped away from her. "Just- I can't be with her, alright?"

He started to move away from her and towards the staircase to the boy's dormitory, when she called out to him softly.

"It's true, isn't it? You're a-a werewolf?!"

* * *

 **A/N: Okay, so that is it. End of the seventh chapter. I am gonna pick up from this point in the next chapter, though even that will start out with flashbacks, just like this one. A flashback of young Remus when he was bitten, and then I am gonna move back to the rest of the story. And for those who didn't like the abrupt transition from the darker stuff to the lighter ones, well yeah I felt so a little bit too. Let me know what you think in the reviews. Though, heads up, the story might get a little darker at some point in the future. But, yeah, there is a fair share of James and Lily fluff you have to look forward to. Soon. Maybe. Maybe not, I don't know. Mahalo!**


	8. Sheep Among The Wolves

**So, this is it. I know, this took up way too much of time than I usually take, and I am soooo sorry for that. I just didn't get the time amidst SO many exams that came up (really bad time of the year, guys). Anyways, presenting, the tiniest bit proudly, Chapter Eight. ENJOY :)**

* * *

Chapter 8

Sheep Among The Wolves

 _It should be comforting. It really, really should, when someone waves it off as an accident. When someone pats you on the shoulder and says that things aren't always going to be this tough. When someone hugs you and says that you were just a kid. You couldn't have seen it coming. Couldn't have even guessed something like that would happen. Sure as hell couldn't have known. Just a kid after all._

 _But it doesn't._

 _It doesn't comfort you. The support doesn't comfort you. Because you know, that no matter how unconditional the support, how immeasurable the love, it changes nothing. Nothing at all. Kid or grown-up, careless or wary, it doesn't make a difference. It's not gonna change what happened. What's been done is done._

 _Even the comfort is more comforting than support._

 _And you know exactly why._

 _Because support is misleading. It dies. Withers out over time. It always_ is _going to be this tough. What stays is the fact that you know who you are, what you're always gonna be. You've been marked. Condemned. And support is temporary, condemnation is eternal._

 _Which is why you've learnt to find comfort in parts of it. People calling you careless is comfortable. Disapproving glances are natural. Being called careless is so much better than being called a monster._

 _Anger is so much better than disgust, right?_

* * *

"It's true, isn't it? You're a-a werewolf?"

Remus froze in his tracks. His breath hitched and his shoulders tensed. Lily could see his frame tighten. The air in the common room immediately seemed to thicken as she waited for him to react. It seemed as a though ages had several sunlit days had passed before he did.

Remus turned around to face Lily, and it took all the strength in her body to stop herself from gasping out. His face, ever so amiable, friendly, polite and inviting, was etched with pain, hurt and confusion. His eyes remained stoic, but his lips trembled and his hands shook, as lines of worry spread across his forehead. And when he spoke, the two words he uttered would have been enough to send someone reeling.

"How long?"

Lily's eyes widened. How was she supposed to answer this? How was she supposed to reply without giving away the fact that she had known for the better part of a year that one of her closest friends was a werewolf, and had said nothing about it?

"How long?" Remus repeated, and Lily was shocked to hear the bitterness in his voice. "A-a year," she managed to croak out.

Remus stayed silent for a while, before slowly nodding. "So, I suppose you want me to leave, now, do you?" He asked, quietly. Lily, who had been staring at the carpet intently, snapped up her head to look at him, but he had turned to face the other side. "What- no, Remus. No, I don't," she tried to explain hastily. When he didn't respond, she reached forward to cup his face. He, however, stepped away from her, slowly turning around to face her.

If she had expected gratitude or hope in his eyes, she had been terribly mistaken. The only emotion that his face betrayed, was disgust. Oddly enough, it didn't seem to be directed at her. Rather, and it made Lily's heart clench to see it, it felt like he was disgusted by himself.

"What do you think you're doing?" He asked her quietly. An answering frown appeared on his face, and he clicked his tongue impatiently. "Lily Evans, what are you doing?" "I-I'm trying to be there for you, Remus," she replied hesitantly. But the answer did not satisfy Remus, who donned a disbelieving expression. "Trying to be there for me?" He asked, incredulously. When Lily stayed silent, he strode towards her and held her by her shoulders, none too gently. Looking straight in her eye, he said violently, "I am going to ask you again, Lily, and I expect an honest answer. What are you doing? Why aren't you running away from me?"

Now it was Lily's turn to look disbelieving. _Did he want her to run away from him?_ "Remus, what are you talking about?" She asked quietly, trying hards not to react to the pain that was shooting up her shoulder. Nevertheless, he let her go. "You're supposed to run, Lily," he said, turning away from her. "Remus"- she began, reaching forward to him, but he cut her off. "You're supposed to run away from me, like the rest," he whispered, talking to himself more than to her. "You're not supposed to 'be there for me'. You're supposed to run away from me"-

"Remy," whispered Lily, reaching forward and grasping his hand gently. Never before had she shortened his name. Then again, never before had she seen him like this. This vulnerable. This _broken_.

"Remy, I don't want to run away from you. Please, listen to me, I am not disgusted by you, Remus, I never could be"-

"You should."

He said with such calmness and acceptance that tears sprung into Lily's eyes. "Remus, no, don't say that. Why would I ever be disgusted by you?" She tried to reason, her voice getting desperate now.

Remus took one glance at her, before throwing his head back and giving a short, humourless laugh. A laugh that made the hair on Lily's arm shoot up straight, a laugh that was in no possible way, Remus'. "Why?" He asked mirthlessly. "Why, Lily Evans? I'll tell you. You should be afraid of me, Lily, because I am a monster, always was, always will be, a monst"-

Remus was cut off by the palm that connected with his face. The slap resonated throughout the room and was so forceful that his head snapped back and then forth again. His eyes widened, but before he could say anything, or react in any way imaginable, a small figure had engulfed him completely.

Lily hugged Remus tightly, resting the side of her head against his chest. She stroked his back slowly and allowed his chin to rest on her head. She sniffed away the tears that had been threatening to spring free and clenched her eyes shut.

Slowly and hesitantly, Remus returned the hug. Lily smiled softly, easing into his grip. "You're my friend, Remus Lupin," she whispered softly. "I love you, Remus, you're a great, beautiful person. You're my friend. And Mary's. And Alice's, and Marlene's. You're James', Sirius' and Peter's brother. And a person that good, could never, ever be a monster. You are someone who got bitten by a werewolf, someone who didn't deserve what he got but faces it strongly anyway. You're _not_ a monster. You're someone who respects his teachers, his studies, his friends and his classmates. You're _not_ a monster. You are someone who could feast entirely on chocolates. You're _not_ a monster."

"Oh, and one more thing," she whispered, breaking the hug so she could look him in the face. "You're _not_ a monster."

Remus' face had tears streaming down his face. Still smiling, Lily raised her hands to his face and wiped them off.

They stood there silently for a while, Lily still cradling Remus' face, before he slowly and hesitantly questioned, "Feast on chocolates?"

Lily huffed at him in annoyance. "That's what you get from my speech?!" She asked incredulously, causing Remus to give a weak, albeit reluctant chuckle.

He moved to the couch and sank back into it. Slowly, Lily followed and sat down tentatively beside him. He ran a hand through his thick wavy hair. "Does- does Mary know?" He asked, his voice low. Lily didn't answer, she didn't have to. Taking her silence for her response, he nodded slowly, and hung his head back, sighing deeply.

"How did it happen? I mean, how did you get bitten?" Lily asked him quietly. Remus gave another dry chuckle, causing her to wince visibly. "Painfully," was all he said.

* * *

 _Halloween. It's a beautiful time of the year. Kids running around with costumes, grown-ups ready with candies. Wonderful feasts, glorious decorations. The excitement is so goddamn contagious. It seeps into your pulse, your brain soaks in all the bright lights and yells of elation, as your heart takes in all the laughter and happiness. Beautiful, yes, oh-so-beautiful!_

 _Of course, little of that matters when you've been cursed to spend the remainder of your days on this planet as an outcast, a pariah. A monster._

* * *

 _It was the Halloween of 1965. Incidentally, or maybe not, it's all a matter of perspective, it was the full moon. The moonlight spread bright and wide throughout the town. The werewolf disguise was quite the rager that year. Hundreds of wolves sprawled the streets, trying to mimic the howls in their low, childish voices._

 _And then there were you._

 _It sounds so stupid when you think of it. You should've gone, dressed up, played, sung and danced with the rest of the kids. Enjoyed while you still could. But no. It was a full moon. Could not let that pass, could we?_

 _It's all so clear. All the mistakes you made. As a kid, sure, but you did._

 _It's ringing. Repeating itself in your head, like clockwork. The lunascope you placed on the windowsill. Gazing out into the stars, looking to catch a glimpse of the full goddamn moon. Leaving the windows open. Going to bed unprotected, giddy with delight at having caught the elusive full moon, wishing you could see a full moon every day._

 _And then: looking into its eyes. The very next thing you remember._

 _Your limbs seize up, your voice caught in your throat. You should shout. Shout. Just yell your throat out. Your father is in the next room. He'll hear you. He'll be there to save you._

 _But you don't. You don't move. You_ can't _move. You can't think. Your brain's addled, muscles paralysed._

 _It doesn't attack instantly. It should, it's reflex. But it doesn't. It seems to be savouring the moment, enjoying your helplessness. Stalking you. Feeding on the dread that is hanging in the air ominously._

 _A click. That's all it takes, really. A click in the next room. The tiniest of sounds. You don't what it is. You don't care. All you know is that there is a monster in your room, and that one simple click snaps you out of it._

 _A lot of things happen in the next instant. You scream, the wolf leaps, his fangs pierce your neck, you hear your father's yell, your mother's screeches, feel the intense pain, and everything begins to go black._

 _And through all of the pain and darkness, the only thing visible is that damned full moon._

* * *

"Merlin!" Lily exclaimed quietly. Her face had gone deathly pale and her eyes were glistening with tears. "Five, Remus?" She asked him softly, her mind still not grasping everything that she had just heard.

"Hmm," muttered Remus distractedly, staring into the fire, his face taut with aged lines. Lily raised her hand and slowly stroked his cheek. A tear slipt from his eye, and without giving it a second thought, she immediately reached out to pull him into an embrace. Her heart clenched at the sight, and it took a painful amount of strain to breathe.

Slowly, Remus pulled out of the hug. "And so it has been ever since," he said, pulling his legs up to rest on the couch. "Every month, I have to turn into that... thing. Every month I'm led outside, through the tunnel by the Willow, into the Shrieking Shack, so that I can transform without hurting anybody."

There was a minute of uneasy silence before Lily cleared her throat. "And, um, the rest of them, they know...?"

Remus turned around to look at her strangely, and she found herself backtracking. "What?" she asked, rather defensively. But Remus seemed to be staring beyond her. After a moment wherein she contemplated if she had something wrong, he burst into laughter.

* * *

 _It was the second year. Frankly, they all felt ashamed that it had taken them a year and a half to figure it out. But now they had. And they waited quietly for Remus to come back into the dorm._

 _"This looks like some weird sort of Intervention," Sirius contributed from his bed. Peter gave a nervous chuckle and the other two gave him identical sympathetic looks. He had been scared beyond his wits when they had told him what they suspected. Poor bloke._

 _The door creaked and all of them jumped simultaneously. Remus entered the room, looking exhausted and sleepy, new lines on his face, adding to the previous ones. "Hey guys," he greeted between yawns. Sirius rolled his eyes at him. "Merlin, Lupin, tone it down a little, don't be_ so _excited to see us." Remus chuckled tiredly, before plopping down on his bed. James and Sirius eyed each other warily before Sirius sat down on his bed. "Say, Remus," he began casually. "Could you help Jamsie here with his third-year Defence studies?" Remus looked up in surprise. "What?" He questioned incredulously. Turning to James: "You're starting third-year defence already? What are you made up of, man?"_

 _James laughed lightly before turning sombre again. "C'mon Remus, you're the best in our year at Defence, surely you can help me with it?" Remus' head dropped back into the bed. "Yeah, sure, what are you starting with?"_

 _"Werewolves," answered James and Sirius together._

 _Remus' head snapped right back up and he turned to look at the two, who were now exchanging triumphant looks. "I knew it, he really is one," said James, grinning. "Ten points for us," Sirius replied appreciatively. "Wait- what are you talking about?" Remus asked, a panic beginning to set in his chest. Surely not..._

 _"We know, mate," Sirius answered enigmatically. Remus frowned at him. "Know what?" "That you're a werewolf," James replied casually, settling down on his bed. There was a moment's silence in which the statement seemed to hang in the air. "W-what?!" Remus asked, obviously frightened. "We know," Sirius replied slowly, as though talking to a five-year-old. "You know?" Remus asked again, stupidly. "That I'm a werewolf? And you're not-?"_

 _"Not what?" James questioned, frowning. "Are we missing something here?" Thorugh all of his fear, Remus managed to raise his eyebrows at him. "Aren't you- aren't you afraid?" "Why would we be?" James quizzed back, still frowning._

 _"Because," Remus replied, frustrated now. "Because I'm a-a monster."_

 _Silence. Apart from Peter's thick, wheezy, frightened breaths, that is. Before James and Sirius burst out laughing._

 _"What the-?"_

 _"What are you laughing about?" Remus questioned, borderline annoyed now. "Remus," James began, barely controlling his laughter. "You keep your chocolates hidden in your sock drawer. Forgive me if I'm not cowering at the sight of your monstrosity."_

 _"How do you know where I keep my chocolates-" "The important point being," Sirius interjected hurriedly. "We aren't afraid of you. We don't know why'd you bother keeping it from us in the first place. I mean, with mine and James' combined genius, and Peter's readiness in bringing us cookies whenever we are working, we were bound to crack it sometime or the other."_

 _Remus frowned at them. "You followed me up till the tunnel, didn't you?" Sirius sighed as he plopped down on his bed. "Take away all the fun, won't you?"_

* * *

It was highly inappropriate, she knew. She knew she shouldn't be laughing at a time like this. And yet, there she was, trying and failing quite spectacularly to control her laughter, while Remus looked on at her, quite amused himself. "Oh, Merlin! I'm sorry, but sock drawers, Remus," Lily exclaimed before abandoning all pretence and bursting out in laughter. Remus chuckled softly alongside her. They sat like that for a while, each basking in the little ease that had crept in the air, a little less uncertainty that threatened. Lily looked up at Remus. His face was set, taut with lines that made him look much older, much warier than a sixteen-year-old should be allowed to look. Her heart clenched at the sight, as she thought back to all the times in the fifth year they had taken rounds together. She remembered scowling at him the first time she had met him, not knowing anything about him other than the fact that he was one of the four Marauders, and yes, that most certainly was a major drawback in any boy, but he had simply smiled back. A polite, completely malice-free smile, and Lily couldn't help but ease up a little. And just like that, they were talking. They were talking about the silliest of things just to make the other feel more comfortable, laughing together at the most stupidest of things, complaining about the same long homeworks, and the stupid, boring prefect-meetings. She never knew when she had managed to ease up so much, but she definitely knew why. It was the testament to the boy sitting beside her right now, that he could make a girl like her, a girl prejudiced against him even before she had met him, to open up about the most personal of things, feel at home in the oddest places.

An idea struck Lily and she immediately sprang up from the couch. Remus looked up at her, startled. Before he could question her, however, she muttered a hasty, 'Be right back," and sprinted off through the portrait-hole.

* * *

About fifteen minutes later, the portrait hole swung back open, and Remus looked up to see-

"Hot chocolate," Lily announced triumphantly, and Remus burst out into laughter. Setting the tray down at the table, she swatted his arm indignantly. "Hey! This is an extremely thoughtful gesture you're laughing at. It takes guts to walk up to the kitchens at midnight. Do you know what could've happened if anyone would've seen me?"

"You would've gotten detention at the worst, lost a few points at the best," Remus supplied, reaching forward to grab his mug. Lily muttered something unintelligible beside him, and he froze, mug inches away from his lips. He slowly turned around to look at Lily, a highly amused look on his face. "What?" Lily asked, feeling defensive again. "You've never gotten detention before, have you?" "What? No, of course, I've gotten a detention before," Lily argued heatedly. "Really? When?!" Remus interrogated. "Well, there was this time in fourth year-" She began, but was cut off by another round of laughter from him. She scowled at him. "Not getting detention is a good thing," she reasoned, her head held high defiantly. Remus only laughed harder. Git.

"Anyway, moving on past that," Lily began, taking a sip of her hot chocolate. "Mary-"

"Probably knows," Remus cut her off, all traces of laughter vanishing from his face. Lily stared at the fire sadly. "Yeah," she quietly confirmed. They sat silently for a while. Lily opened her mouth to say something- "No, Lily," Remus shut her down firmly. "You don't even know what I was going to say," she complained. "Well, I'm pretty sure it starts with 'maybe you should', and ends with 'give things with Mary a chance'."

"Well, you should," Lily argued hotly. "This is stupid Remus, you're allowed to be happy, you haven't committed a crime. It's just-"

"Lily!"

Remus' voice was stern, his face set. Any arguments she might've had died in her throat. "Well, at least talk to her," she said quietly. Remus was silent for a long time, before he nodded slightly. Smiling at him, she leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on his cheek. "Don't let this keep you down, Remus," she said, her voice low. "You're one of the greatest people I know. Don't let this keep you down."Hemus nodded yet again, before standing up. "You should go, get some sleep. It's late."

Lily nodded and stood up herself, giving him one last smile.

"Hey, Lily."

Lily was on her way up to the girls' dormitory, when she stopped an turned around. There was Remus, making his own way to the boys' dorm. He flashed a smile at her. "Thanks for understanding."

Lily rolled her eyes at him. "G'night Remus."

His soft chuckle stayed with him until she opened the door to her four-poster.

* * *

Lily set up her bed slowly. Then, after having made arranged her books for the next day and changed into her nightclothes, she slowly walked up to Mary's bed. Climbing into it, she stroked her blonde locks softly. "So, how much of that did you hear?" She askled quietly. There was a moment's silence, before:

"Nearly all of it."

Her voice was strong and unwavering, and pride gushed inside Lily at her friend. She raised Mary's head and placed it on her own lap. "You're gonna be all right, Mary," she assured softly, her hands still cousing through Mary's hair. "You know you are." She felt Mary nod stiffly against her stomach. "It's just-" her voice was low, and she could sense the unease inside of her. "It's Remus. He's- he's one of the best people I know, he doesnt deserve- all of this- this mess." Lily shushed her slowly, cradling her head. "I know, Mary," she assured quietly. "I know."

They lay there for a while, finding an odd comfort in the silence, before Mary moved back slowly to her original position. Lily flashed her an encouraging smile, before getting up and walking back to her own bed.

"Hey, Lils?"

She turned back around to face her friend, who had raised her profile the tiniest bit to look straight at her. Her eyes were a little puffy, but her expression was expression wasn't weak in the slightest.

"Do you think I'm dull?"

Lily giggled stupidly. "Because you aren't a werewolf, Mary?" She saw Mary roll her eyes and drop back into her bed. "Knew I should've asked Alice." Lily's jaw dropped at her friends' blatancy. "I take offence to that, McDonald." She heard a light laugh in response.

"Go to sleep, Evans."

"Hark, McDonald."

* * *

 **And that's it. End of CHAPTER EIGHT. Whew! That took up a lot of time. Anyway, let me know what you think of it in the REVIEWS. Hot chocolate for anyone who reviews the chapter. And I know this might've made some people mad, but don't worry. Real Lily and the Marauders coming soon...**


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